Courage Is Accepting And Loving My Bi-Racial Features

Being a mixed-woman wasn’t always easy. See, I am neither tall nor short and with hazel eyes, chubby thighs, and super curly hair. I have so many different features mixed into one body that it is hard to love them all.

I especially struggle with loving myself and going all natural because people do not appreciate my natural curls. I know I should not define my own beauty by what people say or think, I just find that hard to do. Taming my afro until it looks good every morning is a long, hard process so sometimes I skip it and do something else with my hair instead. I’ve found other ways to style it with braids and hair bands, and my mom taught me a lot about hair care.

It was hard, though, to see all these girls rocking their long, straight hair while I was stuck with my natural short and curly hair.  One day, a girl in my grade pointed out how different I looked, and that made me feel self-conscious about my natural locks. That was the last day I wore my hair down, and for the next six years I wore my hair either in a bun or in braids. I would only wear it down in the comfort of my own home, putting it back up whenever I was in public.

One summer, while I was at my aunt’s house, her friend pointed out that she liked my hair. She was a photographer, and she invited me to a photo shoot to showcase how girls with brown, short, curly hair are beautiful. I wasn’t truly comfortable with wearing my hair down, letting it dry naturally and be curly in front of cameras. But that was what the photo shoot was all about: natural, curly hair.

Despite my fears, the photo shoot was such a success!

Not only did I have an amazing time, but my picture was chosen to be featured as the magazine cover for a publication in North Carolina.

That day, I realized that my hair is truly beautiful and that it was time for me to wear it down again. I learned to embrace what God gave me and truly love myself.

This experience opened my eyes to what I want to do in the future. I would love to help people love themselves, just like my aunt's friend, my mom and a few teachers who empowered me to love myself as I am. I’d love to be a teacher or a personal trainer or maybe a nurse. I now know that my calling is to help people be happy, but before I do so I have to make sure I am happy myself.